Emotional intelligence (EI) refers to the ability to recognize, understand, manage, and influence one’s own emotions and the emotions of others. This skill helps us connect with people and manage our own feelings as we go through life. It is marked by the following traits:
- Enhanced empathy and understanding of others’ emotions
- Strong intrinsic motivation and perseverance
- Advanced self-awareness and reflective thinking
- Self-regulation skills to manage emotions
- Ability to communicate and resolve conflicts
You may notice that several of these characteristics are also those possessed by profoundly gifted individuals. These traits can be developed further to contribute to their overall well-being, resilience, and success in both academic and personal endeavors. In this article, we will explore the nuances of emotional intelligence in gifted students and provide practical insights for parents and educators.
How Emotional Intelligence Shows Up in Gifted Education
First, let us consider how emotional intelligence affects gifted students academically. This ability empowers individuals to take control of their education as they have the insight as to what drives them. Reflection on their performance is another sign of emotional intelligence in gifted students; they are aware of how they show up each day and in their coursework.
Of course, they will also be in a classroom with other people. Having high emotional intelligence helps them connect with their peers and build meaningful friendships as well as communicate effectively, whether it is for a group project or if they are debating a particular topic. Emotional intelligence ensures they have the skills and awareness to respond thoughtfully and kindly.
Common Social & Emotional Challenges
High emotional intelligence can be a hindrance if a person does not know how to manage their emotions or advocate for their needs. Here are the most common social and emotional challenges gifted students face in the classroom:
- Emotional intensity
- Perfectionism
- Self-isolation
- Boredom
Emotional Intensity
Emotional intensity in gifted individuals refers to their unique way of experiencing emotions, as they exhibit a heightened sensitivity and feel emotions more vividly and deeply. Experiencing such strong emotions—from joy to sadness—leads to intense reactions and behaviors that may seem overwhelming to outsiders.
For gifted students in middle and high school, emotional intensity can be a double-edged sword. On the positive side, it fuels their passion for learning. However, it can also lead to heightened anxiety and feelings of inadequacy.
Here are some strategies that could help gifted students handle their emotional intensity and build emotional intelligence:
- Promote self-awareness
- Teach emotional regulation
- Create a supportive environment
- Encourage creative expression (e.g., writing, art, music)
- Offer professional support
Perfectionism
Many people refer to themselves as “perfectionists.” But how does perfectionism impact gifted students who are usually labeled as the smartest people in the classroom? These students have a tendency to set extremely high standards for themselves, often accompanied by intense self-criticism and fear of failure. This results in excessive stress, avoidance of tasks, and difficulties in accepting mistakes.
These are the top ways to support a gifted student who is struggling with perfectionism:
- Promote self-compassion
- Set realistic goals.
- Teach them how to shift their mindset (e.g., turn a negative thought into a positive one)
- Make sure they are in the right learning environment
Boredom & Self-Isolation
When gifted students are in a learning environment that lacks intellectually stimulating curriculum, they become disengaged. This boredom can further lead to self-isolation, which refers to the individual withdrawing from social interaction. It is also possible for this to occur when the gifted individual feels like their peers do not understand them.
The most important thing a parent or educator can do is help the gifted individual find the right academic setting. If they are able to explore their passions and receive appropriately challenging material, they will be able to rediscover their intrinsic motivation. Other strategies that can help them build emotional intelligence and curb boredom:
- Identify and pursue what interests them (e.g., clubs)
- Encourage them to advocate for themselves
- Help them find a community of like-minded peers
Building emotional intelligence—and the skills that come with it, such as self-regulation and self-advocacy—can help gifted students navigate negative feelings better. Not only will it empower them to succeed in their academic setting, but it sets them up for real-world encounters.
Supporting the Holistic Development of Gifted Students
There are plenty of ways to make sure the gifted child in your life or in your classroom has the tools they need to enhance their emotional intelligence and overall well-being.
The Role of Parents & Educators
Parents are the main support system for many children. Because of this role, they should create an open-minded and encouraging atmosphere at home. A few ways they can do so is through validating emotions, teaching self-regulation skills, and modeling emotional intelligence.
Educators in gifted programs are highly knowledgeable and experienced in working with this population. It’s also common for them to receive specialized training to better support the emotional needs of their students. For example, they learn to recognize signs of emotional distress and follow up with appropriate measures. Teachers use mindfulness techniques, journaling, and peer mentoring to help gifted individuals manage stress and build resilience.
Practical Strategies & Activities
Supporting emotional intelligence in gifted students involves implementing practical strategies that enhance their self-awareness, emotional regulation, and social skills. These are some practical strategies you can help gifted students implement:
- Mindfulness techniques: Deep breathing, mediation, progressive muscle relaxation, and guided imagery
- Role-playing and social skills training: Helps gifted students navigate complex social interactions, recognize social cues, and build empathy
- Journaling and self-reflection exercises: Reflective writing serves as an outlet for gifted individuals to explore their thoughts, feelings, and experiences while also processing their emotions and tracking their emotional patterns
In-school Support
Social and emotional support at school is a must when it comes to nurturing emotional intelligence in gifted students. One way schools can help is providing easy access to counseling and psychological services. Davidson Academy, for instance, offers a range of support, including regular check-ins with counselors and teachers, mindfulness techniques, and community resources.
Another way is through personalizing their education and leaning into each gifted student’s interests. This touches on the “intrinsic motivation” piece of emotional intelligence. At Davidson Academy, students with their parent(s), a guidance counselor, and the curriculum team collaborate to develop a Prospective Learning Plan (PLP). These plans do not alter the core curriculum; instead, they layer in a variety of classes based on student interest and competence on top of it.
Developing emotional intelligence in gifted students is essential for their holistic growth and success. Keep in mind that this is a continuous process. Schools and parents should work together to create a supportive environment that adapts to the evolving needs of gifted students. By integrating emotional intelligence into everyday interactions and learning experiences, we can help them navigate their emotional landscapes and leverage their abilities.